Added by on January 13, 2015

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Are you ADDICTED to your struggle? Do you spend most of your time thinking about why you can't meet women? Or why you've got a clear disadvantage over other guys? Or why women don't get you? Or why it's so hard to meet women in most places?

If you do then you may be addicted to your struggle. That's when you start to focus almost exclusively on the obstacles rather than the goal you have. In other words, you're focussing on why you can't attract or approach women rather than on HOW YOU CAN attract or approach women. Big difference.

Be honest with yourself. Do you think about how you can or why you can't?

If it's the latter then it's time to change your mindset and get your eye on the price. Because if you don't you literally won't be able to see it. Because the obstacles will literally block your view.

So if you want to learn how to approach women and attract women consistently let me help you change your mindset the way I did it for myself to go from super shy guy to a guy that's been dating women I would have thought were out of my league just a few years ago.

Best thing it's possible to do this without selling your soul, lying, pretending to be someone else or old school pick up routines.

Check out what's possible here:

Inner Game of Approaching Women – Stop Being Addicted To Your Struggle:

music track by Huma Huma – Youtube Library



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  • LemonZeppelin 2 years ago

    I agree. Here’s another good saying “Those who think they can and those who
    think they can’t are usually both right.” If you say that you will never
    meet women, or never get a girlfriend, you probably won’t. But if you get
    into the mindset of “Actually, I can do this”, then you’ll have more
    success. It’s all about self belief.

  • schalt 2 years ago

    Sorry, but most stupid question i’ve ever heard. Looking for a girl that
    dont drink, in BAR/CLUB? Oh christ… help this man who asked that

  • Tushar Shrotriya 2 years ago

    This is not just great dating advice, it’s great advice for life! I see
    many people (and sometimes even myself) stuck in silly situations, and then
    I realize that I should just get over it and the problem just goes away!
    It’s that simple! Convincing yourself that you have a problem only makes it

  • How can I “re – attract” a girl?

    Basically, I met a girl at the beginning of October. We chatted, she added
    me on Facebook, and messaged me frequently. She invited me out a couple of
    times, but each time I was too slow at making a move, and probably acted
    too nice. The way I see it, I’m in one of two scenarios: 1. She got bored
    and has stopped pursuing. 2. She thinks I don’t like her and has stopped
    pursuing. Basically, I’m kicking myself, as I really like her, but didn’t
    move quickly enough, and it’s driving me genuinely crazy. It’s like the
    scene in the Godfather, when Michael sees the Italian girl and it stops him
    in his tracks (except he does something about it, fast).

    I’m sure your answer will be “it’s done, move on”. However, this just is
    not going to happen any time soon (believe me, I’m trying!), so I need to
    know if I can somehow re-kindle the attraction?

  • Donna Perry 2 years ago

    ….”you need”, “you should”, “get over it!”…….sounds like a bunch of
    scoldings to me and not in any way helpful

  • Viktor Julian Szymanski 2 years ago

    Changing venues from clubs to bars really helped me to talk to more women.
    It was simply too loud to use my language skills. I think the major problem
    is that especially in western europe, and scandinavian countries, people
    are not used to being approached on the street, the busstop, in the metro,
    train, the supermarket, library etc. You will have to overcome a really
    strong barrier when you meet people in public areas, because they will
    enter an almost defensive like position with the questions in mind; “Why
    are you talking to me? What do want from me ?” 😀 Compared to eastern and
    southern europe, it is natural to talk to people everywhere. So you don’t
    meet that predefined defensive stance. I wish the mentality would be the
    same in Denmark as it is in Poland or Italy. 

  • Tompe Frompe 2 years ago

    Stephan, do you have any tips for the deep, intellectual, philosopher,
    thinker-type kind of guy? It can be very hard for me to be easy, carefree
    and the “happiest guy in the room” because it simpy means I have to
    pretend. I wouldn’t say I am a pessimist or have confidence issues but I
    just have a pretty complex view on life and a complex personality which
    makes it pretty har for me to not give away vibes that are a bit odd, or
    perhaps “non-inviting”.

  • RuggedALAN 2 years ago

    Stephan do you get good quality punani?

  • chagall56 2 years ago

    Stephan, Are you familiar with an American psychologist named Brian
    Gilmartin? When I read his book many years ago, I recognized myself. I’ve
    made many bad decisions in my past concerning women, but I can’t go back
    and change those outcomes. I’ve been watching your lectures for what seems
    like many years. Your lectures are excellent, but sometimes I feel the
    need for a real life demo as it were. I saw a video on Youtube a few years
    where two American “experts” tried to coach three shy, awkward British men
    to meet women. The experts would watch the men from a distance and
    critique them afterward. It was interesting to say the least what
    happened. Most of the time the attempts to meet women resulted in
    failures, but the coaches kept encouraging them. After several awkward
    failures of this type, I think all three at some point wanted to quit
    trying. The average guy of course has no expert coaching him in the
    background. My point here is do you ever have ordinary guys try out your
    methods in the field? 

  • ChunkyBlack 2 years ago

    +Stephan Erdman | Authentic Game do u still send out emails? Haven’t
    received one for almost a month, thanks for everything you’ve offered me so
    far by the way

  • brianpso 2 years ago

    Wow, this was a great one. Like a slap to the face. Thanks

  • “Don’t go to bars and clubs. Go anywhere else where the women can
    appreciate your personality”

    (Clap-Clap-Clap-Clap-Clap. . . .)

  • Stephan Erdman | Authentic Game 2 years ago

    Are you ADDICTED to your struggle? 

  • theFormidable1 2 years ago

    You need to cold approach females on the streets or shopping malls this is
    the best way to pick up females

  • Max Packtunov 2 years ago

    Thank u, Stephan!

  • European Husky 2 years ago

    spot on,